Okay, WordPress…WTH??? I am getting notification messages when I reply to the comments ON MY OWN POSTS!! I thought I suddenly got popular with all of those new comments, but it was only ME!!! What a let-down!
The Unvarnished Truth of Me November 24, 2012
Hi again. It’s me, Rainey. I have missed your daily support and encouragement as I traverse through life, but I felt the need to pull back for a while. I could lie, and tell you I just got really busy, and things were going great, but that would wrong. You deserve better from me; you at least deserve the truth.
I stopped blogging for the same reason that I have, all of my life, suddenly stopped calling close friends. It’s the same reason I broke up with one or two of my old boyfriends. It’s also the same reason that, when I got married, I moved to a new town and recreated a brand new life, leaving behind everyone and everything I used to know and love. So here it is, the unvarnished truth of me:
You got too close. And you cared about me.
It’s what I do, you see. I run when anyone gets close enough to see the cracks in the veneer or to care about me at all. I will give you a piece of me, a glimpse inside, and then I pull back and run for the hills. I don’t mean to hurt people, but I do. I don’t know why I do this, and I don’t know how to make myself stop.
I bared more in this blog than I have ever told anyone in my entire life. Actually, I am super surprised that I let so much of my soul peek out before I ran. I guess the blog masked me enough that I felt some safety in allowing my true self to show. But I have only shown you glimpses. There is so much more, so much bad and good, ugly and light, humor and horror. So much more is hidden so deep inside I don’t even know what is in there anymore.
So. That is the true reason I have been gone for so long. I’m not sure yet if I have the courage to return, but I hope I do. I have missed you all dearly. And that is also the unvarnished truth.
And the Award Goes to….You, the Reader! July 31, 2012
I have received not one but TWO awards from two very special people! I know many of you don’t care for awards, but I think they are fun and a way to get to know one another better. So, first let me thank Crazy Bean Rider for selecting me for the “Seven Things” award (Is it an award? It is if I decide to see it that way because perception is reality!) She is blessed with a writing gift and I enjoy what she shares.
1. Thank the blogger who nominated you. THANK YOU CRAZY BEAN!!
2. Share seven things about you.
3. Nominate other bloggers you think deserve the award, and post on their blog to let them know they have been nominated.
Seven Things About Me
1. No one knows that I write poetry.
2. I’m very artistic, but my house is very plain. Most things I create I give away. I don’t know why I don’t decorate my home with my crafts. When I see paintings/art I created hanging on the walls in someone’s house, it startles me.
3. Strong, black coffee is a must. No questions. Just. a. must.
4. I love riding motorcycles, but I don’t drive my own. It’s not that I can’t, I would rather ride on the back so I can take pictures and look around. My favorite thing to do is fly down a curvy road on the edge of a mountain cliff.
5. I have a nice, luxury car, but I prefer to drive the old ’94 four-wheel drive Blazer. It’s more me.
6. My goal is to sell everything I own, buy a nice RV camper, and live the rest of my life in a campground.
7. I am considering getting my master’s degree. I just need to get my head right first.
The second award comes from my good friend, Dot. I have a feeling if Dot and I lived near each other, we would hang out regularly! She’s just one of those few people in the world that get it!
Here are the Rules:
1. Thank the giver. THANK YOU, DOT!
2. Post 7 things about yourself.
3. Pass the award on to 7 other bloggers and let them know they’ve been nominated.
4. Include the logo of the award in a post or on your blog.
Seven things about me:
See the list at the top…I’m cheating! I’m also cheating on the passing it on; I don’t know who has received either of these, or who would even want to take part, so I’m leaving it up to you, dear reader; if you follow me and want to accept, you are nominated!
Lightness and Dark May 1, 2012
There is something fabulous about the sun shining through a dark forest. The deep, muted shades of green accented by the sun-speckled brighter greens cast beautiful patterns. Each shade makes you appreciate the other. Without the light, there is only darkness. Without the dark, there is only lightness. We all need a little darkness and a little lightness in our lives. I am still searching for that balance, and for the ability to truly appreciate both. That, my friends, is my journey.
Flower Photos to. . . . . .Suicide? April 22, 2012
My own flowering bushes… It is strange how a picture such as this can lead to a fiction writing about suicide. I took this picture yesterday and when I looked at it earlier today it somehow sparked the post ‘The Destruction of Flowering Bushes’ (see previous post). It just shows you how my mind works! 🙂
Lucky 100 April 21, 2012
I have managed to reach a milestone. Actually, I have reached two milestones today. First, I wrote my 100th post earlier. It doesn’t seem like I have written that many, but according to the WordPress Gods who keep up with these things, it was number 100. This one will actually be number 101, if you are keeping count.
My second, and most important milestone is….(insert drum roll)…..I received my 100th follower today, …………………………………………….. and……………………wait for it……………… it was none other than Le Clown, from Le Clown On Fire. (If you haven’t read his blog, you should run over there now and read it). Seriously, I am honored (honoured, for my friends across the pond) that there are FIVE people, let alone 100 who want to read anything I write.
So this thanks goes out to all 100 of you….you know who you are! 🙂 Thanks for joining me on this wild ride of life!