Rainey Daze and Crazy Nights

Poetry, Paintings, and Ponderings: Through My Eyes

Bohemian Song October 27, 2013

Here I am

in the October sun

Not looking for love

just looking for fun

~

A nomad at heart

I don’t stay around long

I put miles behind me

with a bohemian song

~

Drinking a  beer

hat pulled way down low

It’s not even five

but I’m itching to go

~

A nomad at heart

I don’t stay around long

I put miles behind me

with a bohemian song

~

No chains to hold me

no people in my way

I go where the wind blows

never will I stay

~

A nomad at heart

I don’t stay around long

I put miles behind me

with a bohemian song

~

This life is for me

I like it better this way

I see what I want

something different each day

~

A nomad at heart

I don’t stay around long

I put miles behind me

with a bohemian song

~

I put miles behind me

with a bohemian song.

my road

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Art Festival and Nourishment of My Soul July 29, 2013

Artist at work

Artist at work

Those are panoramic photographs on the right

Those are panoramic photographs on the right

Lots of people!

Lots of people!

Metal art

Metal art

I took a nice, much-needed trip to a festival in the mountains. Seeing the beautiful artwork of others really inspired me. It also made me feel great about my own work. Sometimes I feel like my work is so…untalented…not good enough. I know people TELL me it’s good, but you know how that goes; these people love me (or at least like me and must see me regularly). After seeing the art for sale….that people were BUYING, I feel like my work (some of it) might actually sell in the right market. So I’ve decided to try it. I’m going to complete as many pieces as I can, then sign up for a booth at a local festival.

As for my trip, it helped to clear my head. I’ve been in a fog the last few weeks. Not really depressed, just existing. I’ve just watched the hours turn into days. Now I feel ready to do something. I have a purpose again.

I’m including a few pictures of the festival. It was great! I sat on the sidewalk, eating Thai food, listening to a local band, and watching the people walk by and thought what a wonderful life it would be to travel to various festivals and sell art you lovingly crafted. That fits my ideal lifestyle! I met such interesting people and had great conversations about art and life. My soul feels nourished again.

 

Gypsy Vs. Small Town Me March 30, 2013

I am so restless. I itch to make things happen, and yet I do nothing. Is it because I am scared? Is it because I am just a lazy dreamer? Is it because I don’t know how to start? I don’t really know.

Am I destined to live my life with this restless spirit, or is there some way I can live this life I have and satisfy my desire to wander? It is like I am two people in one: one reliable person who is the wife and mother living in Small Town, USA. This person baked cookies, made homemade jelly, coached softball, and taught all the neighborhood kids how to create awesome science projects. She desired a house with a big yard and traditional furnishings. She is the good wife, daughter, and mother. The other person inside of me is a gypsy. She doesn’t care about social norms; she lives by her own set of rules. She believes in the spiritual goodness found in nature. Her one desire is to wander the earth to see all there is to see. Her life is found in a traveling caravan. She creates beautiful things just for the sake of beauty.

I know we all have different parts of our personalities, but mine seem to be constantly waging war with one another because they are polar opposites. The older I get, the more Gypsy me tries to take over. It’s like I have been what society expects me to be for as long as I could, and now I feel restless and rebellious to let the ‘real’ me take over. I want to see things, do things, have experiences that Small Town me could never do. Some times I am disgusted by what I allowed myself to become, because it is not the me I hold in my heart.

So, do I just walk away from this life? How do you walk away from a family that  you love? YOU DON’T! So how do you find a peaceful way to allow the Gypsy me to be satisfied without harming the people and life I led? I feel selfish just THINKING these thoughts; I lived my life putting my family before me. I have much to be thankful for; please know I am not complaining nor do I take what I have for granted. I just know this restlessness is not going away…it is growing stronger day by day.

flower5

 

Today’s Adventure January 19, 2013

Today was a day of exploration of a seaside town. J and I decided to get away, just the two of us. We walked the historic district, and I took some (hopefully) great shots of the buildings.  I spent an hour in a local used book store! We enjoyed a great cup o’ Joe at a local shop, walked a river walk section of town, and had lunch at a local burrito restaurant. The weather was perfect for our day! J was in good spirits, so it was very enjoyable spending time with her. After lunch, we went down to the beach and took pictures.  I discovered a little sound side park with beautiful twisted trees. All-in-all, it was a wonderful and relaxing day!

Beachwalk

 

 

Photos, Adventures, and Thinking: Recipe for a Great Day January 12, 2013

It was a beautiful day for an adventure. I traveled far, but didn’t get as many shots as I wanted. I’m okay with that, though, because the journey itself was soothing and somewhat restored my good spirits. Traveling gives me time to ponder many of life’s questions, and reflect on the problems in my soul. More on some of my thoughts later. For now I will say: I realized I have spent too much of my life living for others because I thought it was the “right” thing to do. Thinking of my own needs only made me feel selfish. I must work to change that mindset because it makes me miserable and only enables others to be more dependent on me. That may seem simple to you, but it is a life-changing thought for me.

It has been a long and lovely day.

Amber Waves and Blue Skys

 

 

Adventure is Good For the Soul January 11, 2013

Going on a camera adventure tomorrow to lift my spirits; stay tuned!

 

Oasis Path

 

Wandering Photographer January 6, 2013

I took a friend’s advice and took the day off yesterday…with my camera. ( Thanks for the idea, Hannah…BTW, you can meet Hannah here…she’s worth following, trust me.) I actually went for a long ride…traveling through three states…and took pictures along the way.  Nothing planned; if it was something that caught my eye, I stopped and clicked away. I know locals were driving by thinking, “What the hell? That chick must be cray cray…she’s standing beside a busy highway taking pictures of the old Jenkins house”…..but I DON’T CARE! It was fabulous! It was entertaining! And I saw some great things. This may need to be my new weekend hobby! See more of my photo adventures on my photo blog…Rainey’s View, if you care to look. 🙂

“What are you doing this weekend? Want to go to the mall or Target to look at stuff we cannot afford to buy?”

“No, I’ve got plans to fill my car up with gold gas and drive around to find broken down buildings, fields full of cows and cow shit, and graffiti covered trains to photograph. Want to go? I only got chased once by that pissed-off farmer with the gun….and that angry bull when I tried to get up close and personal. It’s lots of fun.”

And I wonder why I have no close friends.

On the Farm